I will believe when it suits me

Reams of paper, truckloads of ink cartridges and unimaginable man hours have been spent on the subject. Hence you may very well argue that I need not add my humble contribution to waste. However I argue that as an ordinary thinking man, I have an indisputable right to get shocked by whatever is happening in these times I am living and hence question and justify my position.

I was born to parents who followed the most common Indian form of worship, I would call that a more appropriate form of appellation than ‘believers of Hinduism’. My mother lit oil lamps in front of calendar pictures depicting colourful and imaginative beings she called Gods and asked me to pray. She told verses praising them and I did that. I was also a person who followed the most common Indian form of worship.

Now it was a matter of my preference that in my youth I became a true believer in the ancient Indian form of worshipping multiples of gods each representing from abstract quality, forms of nature, to human aspirations and dreams. More problems I believed insurmountable I came across I became more ritualistic. I went to the temple whenever I can, I called upon a particular goddess who was supposed to answer all prayers, I climbed sacred hills, I circumambulated every temple I came across with prayers in my heart and lips. I had conversations with my gods and goddesses. I believed that they answered my prayers and gave answers. At this point I make it clear that I believed so because I believed that I did receive answers to my fervent prayers. Now I am older. Much more ice has melted in the artic. I am unable to pray as before.

What is the difference between those times and now, except for my age? The absence of uncertainty, the absence of fear that life may take away whatever it has given me. When life took away what little it gave me, as all afflicted I questioned, why me? I got no answer. But I saw that life moved on, the wounds healed, the scabs dried and new pink skin grew strong and brown. I again learned to laugh and sing. In the process I also started looking through my fears with a sort of inevitability. Fears would always be there as they germinate from deep within me, from my requirement to live as I do for the rest of my life, my requirement to stay pain free, my requirement to stay physically, economically and mentally safe. Once I accept that these fears would always be there, I lost my belief in worship.

Still when I go past a temple perhaps due to habit I mumble a quick prayer, in the nights before I fall asleep I mumble a prayer. The other day I told myself that there is no God.. no heavenly being out there ever ready to help you in your most desperate moments. I was actually scared for a few seconds. So I will not a firm non believer either.

I will be a believer when it suits me.

How to make money in Stock Market

                       The game that the Stock Market plays…I just cannot understand this. All I know is that it is bent upon defeating me. The battle between Inga and the Indian Stock Markets have acquired epic proportions – like that between the giant marlin and the old man, between Moby Dick and Ahab, Henry Tudor the VIII and Roman Catholic Church, Mahatma Gandhi and the British colonial empire.. these examples can fill one full written page.

Now that I have stated my case, as I any good argument let me bring in examples. Eg: 1 – tip received Buy Karur Vysya Bank. Buy Karnataka Bank. Now time for guessing. You lose. The Person who gave me the tip calls in 15 minutes and asks, Inga did you buy Karnataka Bank? Inga says Yes. But how did you know? I knew because Karnataka Bank tanked while KVB has gone up.

Inga buys BGR Energy. From that day onwards poor BGR Energy has languished. I have lost 30%.

Now please do not think that I quit before a concerted effort. Joan of Arc of Stock Markets, Inga of Chennai !! So I read. The Intelligent Investor, How to Make Money in Stock Markets, How I made 2 Million in Stock Market. This list can also fill a full written page. Then I zoomed in on The Secret. Great idea. How did I miss it so far? Yes… Shah Rukh Khan had also repeated this mantra in one of his movies, if you want something with the whole of your mind; the entire nature will go towards getting you your wish. So I get up in the morning with the mantra that the value of the shares I bought the previous day goes up on that day.

I do not know why entire nature is against me. My portfolio says, total investment Rs 600,000. Current value Rs 500,000.

Any advice?

Stranger in Tokyo

We reached Narita at around 4.00 PM. By the time we reached Toyo City Air Terminal it was late in the evening. When we reached our hotel in Otemachi it was rather late. We were hungry and the hotel did not provide dinner. We were vegetarians. We were dead tired.

Where could get some decent vegetarian food. We were told to walk down the road where there were restaurants. We should get something. However it was rather late. Anyhow we might as well try. It was that or the bed on empty stomachs.

We did not know Japanese, however we were three and we would try. We walked down the road.

The restaurants were beginning to close; still there were a few open. We could look through the menu cards open for our approval. We were not comfortable. The pictures of the food platter had too many unfamiliar shapes. Where can we get some vegetarian food? One of us asked. No fish, no meat and no sea food. I chipped in. I had been warned that Japanese considered fish to be vegetarian. I once had had the experience of having a vegetable salad with fish flakes added for flavour. My vegetarian palette could just not take it. It could be rather embarrassing when you have actually no control over your reactions at certain times.

We would have walked around for about half an hour. Then we saw this young man, an absolute stranger. He stopped and told us in good English that it would be difficult to get vegetarian food in that part of the world. We were thankful and wondered whether we could take further help from him. We did not have to ask. He offered and wandered with us from one restaurant to another on those streets. Finally a Chinese one promised to make us the vegetarian food we needed – no meat, no fish and no sea food and so fish oil or fish flakes please. He took us through the menu card, explained the ingredients, and suggested the best course. We had wonderful food, freshly made to our order. Food for the hungry.

Our companion for the night told us that he was a student. He had his dinner with us. He offered to pay. We refused politely. It was our pleasure.

He directed us back to our restaurant. We being very cautious said our good nights and parted.

Why did he do this for us? He had spent his entire evening for us. Would I do that?

I decided to leave him there, our companion for that one mid November evening in Tokyo. Whoever you are I thank you. You are the Good Samaritan…

The beginning

There is a beginning to everything. I begin thus...

"How comes it, say, Maecenas, if you can,
That none will live like a contended man
Where choice or chance directs, but each must praise
The folk who pass through life by other ways?

Thus said Horace in his Satires.

There was this gathering. A small gathering when a larger one collected in Cairo seeking change. In a drawing room under the mechanical breeze created by a fan. The old man spoke and the younger ones listened politely. He spat out the frustrations hidden in his depths, like a volcano dormant for years. A pall of sadness fell over the gathering. No one wanted the old man to continue. what is the use? they asked sensibly... they are made sharper these days, others said.

I remembered Horace.

so let me start. I take an oath to live like contended man. Oh no... no. I will live a contended life.

Let all the gods watching over us insane humans have mercy on us...

Inga